Okay so I always two to three books going at a time, as of right now, it is the Book of Mormon with Bro. Ridges, Why do my prayers seem unanswered, 40 Days to Transformation and If God Loves Me, Why This?. I am Highly recommending the book 'If God Loves Me, Why This?"to read for right now to those of us who said YES to agency and truly get confused by it!!! There are four truths that the author Kim Nelson brings out to shed light that will help us find happiness in God's plan for us and comfort when we ask things like,"If God Loves me, why this?" Have you ever thought this questions or pondered why bad things DO happen to good people? I have never questioned that bad things are going to happen to us, because it rains on the just a well as the unjust. I can see clearly the growth we experience when we go through hard things. How much more hardy we become when going through hardships. So that kind of question hasn't been a problem for me.
But the four truths he brings out are these.
1) Understanding our role in the plan of salvation is the first step to understanding our inherent value.
2) God is our Father, And as our Father, the depth of his parental love for us is boundless.
3) Satan is working to prevent us from feeling God's love. We must recognize the level of the adversary's commitment to blind us from the truth about God and ourselves.
4) We are here to learn to be like our Father. We have an unique, personal mission to perform during our earthly test.
Where I get confused so often, and it most likely because of the world's way or the opinion of others is where if we are working at trying to become like our Father, then we never stop parenting. So where is the line? I know once a parent always a parent, I am a mother for eternity. My children, will never be able to get rid of me, hahaha. So what I do come to concerning this is, that since Father knows what is best for us and he is perfect, he will know perfectly, there will be times that we as parents will know what we should or should not do for our children as they grow and progress. Since we are not perfect, it plain isn't easy to figure it out always. So I'm grateful for the Spirit of the Lord, or the scriptures, or inspired leaders to help and assist me in this all-encompassing role.
There are two models of love, and one is God's and one is the adversary's. God loves us, He is all about us, where the adversary is all about himself. BUT, here is one more aspect, and that is we can easily Love our children straight to hell. We must constantly be using agency, which by the way, is rules, consequences and rewards model. With lots of love. If we do rules without the consequences or rewards, we are not using agency. If we use just consequences, we are not using agency and so forth. So loving kids to hell means we let them do whatever they want under the guise of agency without any wisdom, without capability to make those choices at that time in their lives. So guess what, it's very tricky. Anyhow enough babbling. Get the book and enjoy his insights into agency and just what foder we are to Satan. We don't mean much to him, he is just trying to prove Heavenly Father wrong and himself right. That makes me want to fight harder and do the right thing. I hope all of this makes sense to you!!
So agency, well it's still difficult to get all of the way!