We finally know what's different about couples that stay happily married. It's not that they are better matched, better looking, more in love or more passionate. It's not that they have fewer differences or less to fight about. In fact . . .
In fact, successful couples have the same number of
disagreements as couples who divorce.
Even more interesting, research shows that all couples disagree about the same
basic issues - money, kids, sex, housework, in-laws, and time.
The difference between successful and unsuccessful
couples is how they handle these differences.
Successful couples disagree in a way that
makes their relationship stronger.
They also have other skills, knowledge, and attitudes that help
them build and maintain happiness and satisfaction.
The good news is that anyone can
learn to do it – marriage – better and smarter.
Couples can unlearn the behaviors that destroy
love and replace them with the behaviors
that keep their love alive.
Learning what to expect in marriage as you go through the
different stages is an important first step. Then learning
the skills to manage the predictable challenges (differences) along the way,
will give you confidence and a "can do" attitude – success breeds more success;
you'll build marriage muscles.
The other good news is that you can learn all this in simple and affordable Marriage Education classes.
Also, good news, is that there are many different courses - many
different programs and classes from which to choose. Sample and shop till you find your favorites.
The average class is 2 days, but there are 4 hour classes, one-day classes,
weekend classes, classes that meet one night a week for six or eight weeks, marriage retreats, etc.
There is a broad range of both secular and faith-based programs.
There are courses for couples at any stage:
• married - newlyweds or on the brink of divorce
• new parents or parents of adolescents
Research shows that all couples need the same basic information and the same basic skills –
couples can use the tools to build a good relationship from the ground up as newlyweds;
or to make a good relationship even better; or to rebuild a marriage or relationship
that's seriously in need of repair – that feels like it's 'all out of love'.
It turns out you CAN learn how to get the feeling back.......and keep love alive.
See the Directory of Programs for a listing of the many
different courses and find one near you - or take a marriage vacation and spend
a weekend out-of-town learning to become masters of marriage.
Give a course – classes make the best wedding, anniversary, retirement, or new baby gifts – a
gift that will keep on giving.
Visit the Articles page or listen to CDs, MP3 downloads, or watch DVDs to help
you to learn about this new approach that is not counseling or therapy – it's "driver's education" for marriage.
ABOUT | Diane Sollee, Director | CONTACT | Books/DVDs
My heart breaks for so many couples that end their marriages before they even get started. They are in effect disillusioned. And they don't realize just how much work it really does take. I don't proclaim to have all the answers, but I do know it takes diligence in learning a "better way". No one is exempt.